School's starting in 2 weeks time. Die boy.

Met c1 and eug just now. Went to KBOX. Sang lots of songs. This time, we didn't sing the standard amount of Jay Chou songs! What we did was to sing Shao Nian by Guang Liang. A lot of times. KBOXing when there's only 3 people rocks!
















Being a construction worker is cool!
















Classic Ah Beng style.















Wei Lian'd!















Rocker Lifestyle!















Just like Aragorn! But Aragorn don't have the specs!















KJ and the Wand Of Stupidity















Climbing the corporate ladder!















Smiling is not allowed in the construction yard.















Enough said! Ask for more details -X















Songs are for everyone!















Doggy style!















Juliet! Please get down!















Bennified.















Rocker on a rocker.















Wry smile.















Randy and the wand.















Wei Lian and his guitar!















Shopping spree!

Kwek Kiat Jun V Storm HairDressing Pte Ltd

Celestial Court

[2005] WLR 283

Hearing-Dates: 18 October 2005

18 October 2005

Catchwords:
Contract - Defendants can go suck my balls.

Headnote:
The plaintiff, a student, went to Company Storm HairDressing Pte Ltd(Hereby known as Storm), to cut his hair. An employee of Storm, a Serene, however, against the Plaintiff's wishes, cut the plaintiff's fringe to lengths unacceptable. This, inter alia, caused the plaintiff great distraught. The plaintiff considered suicide. After much words from the Plaintiff's friend, a Tang Pin Chen, the plaintiff decided to sue Storm Hairdressing for causing distraught. The case proceeded to the House Of Satire.

Held - The plaintiff is awarded damages for the following reasons -

(i) Defendant's employee, Serene, has a track record for giving bad haircuts.
(ii) The employee, Serene, did not follow the Plaintiff's directions. The plaintiff asked Serene to pass him the "style book", which Serene failed to do so. Also, Serene cut the Plaintiff's fringe to a length unacceptable, which the Plaintiff told her to "trim".
(iii) The defendant's employee gave the Plaintiff a rush job as the employee Serene had an appointment. However, the defendant owe the Plaintiff a certain degree of workmanship which the defendant failed to do so.

Per Curiam i) Much of the difficulty of this case lies on the terminology "unacceptable length." and "trim". The defendants argued that the length to cut is within the perogative of the employee, as the employee is a professional, thus knowing the exact length to cut. However, the court decides that the plaintiff is to be informed, which the employee failed to do so.

Notes:

This is a satire. The author will not hold any responsibilty for any cases won or lost, or any resemblance to any cases or people, alive or dead.

Cases Referred to:

Randy VS Storm Hairdressing Pte Ltd 2004
Xing Xiang VS Monsoon 2005

Introduction:

Please read headnote for more detail. The author does not wish to type out any more background infomation. Don't laugh Sheree.

Counsel:
Tang Pin Chen, Talk Cock Advocates and Solicitors for Plaintiff. Cheryl Tang, Has Three Breast Ha Ha Ha for Defendant.

Panel:
Lord Bao Qing Tian, Lady Guan Yin Ma, Lord Jesus Christ.

Judgement-1: Lord Bao Qing Tian

Judgement 1
KJ is handsome. K THNX BYE. Serene is in the wrong. If this was the dynasty I lived in, Serene would have gotten beheaded.

Judgement-2: Lady Guan Yin Ma

Judgement 2
Please refrain from beheading Serene. Compassion is the key to life. Orh Mee Tuo Fuo.

Judgement-3: Lord Jesus Christ

Judgement 3
Thou thinketh that if thee Lord Bao were to beheadeth Serene, Thou willeth resurrecteth Serene, for Serene is a Christianth name, and if thee Lord Bao were to executeth, he shalt executeth Judas, who betrayeth thou. Amen.

Disposition
Storm Hairdressing Pte Ltd will sacrifice a goat for Lord Jesus Christ, and to pay the Plaintiff for damages, in amount of $1000000000 hell notes or incense, or both, whatever the Plaintiff deems correct.

Court Dismissed.

going out to buy a nice T shirt later!

Listened to Jay Chou's Ye Chu. Moonlight Sonata or something. Or Nocturne. Jay's signature style. At first I hate that song. The more you listen the more you like it. And you can only understand it if you have the lyrics. ATTA JAY!

Those willing to sacrifice civil rights for social security should deserve neither.

How I wish everyone understands this phrase. I'm sick and tired of when I tell people I want to vote for Opposition, everyone says that I'm an ingrate. There's no gratefulness in politics; only the present and the future. The past are ashes. I wish that I can blog out all my thoughts without fear of the bloody sedition act, not that what I wanna say is racist or whatever. I'm sick of censoring what I wanna say cos' the Party might sue me. Damn it.

Singapore is independent for what? 40 years? For the overwhelming majority of these 40 years, we have been living in peace with our other friends. Is there even a need for the sedition act anymore? I doubt so. If we still cannot learn to live in peace with others after 40 years, I don't think I will be proud to live in this country anyway. The sedition act is outdated in my opinion. Not that my opinion is worth anything, but it's my damn opinion anyway.

What a hectic week!

Sunday

Visited my brother at SAFTI. Hmm. He looks mature now! Damn fit arh boy! SAFTI may look like paradise outside, but it's more like Auswitz Concentration Camp. A lot of wayanging and stuff. Not gonna elaborate. Might get sued for Defamation or something.

Anyway, when I was in the car, bad news struck. My cousin died. Yup. She was 12. Cogential heart disease robbed my cousin's life away. I still remember what she said. She said she sooo wanna live. Now she's gone. May you rest in peace girl.

Monday

Went to Aljunied to paste stickers. My job ok? After pasting shit for 10 hours, I went to my cousin's funeral. Damn heart breaking. The mother was so....lost. She weren't crying, but her eyes showed no emotions. Just...eyes. Glazed. It's really sad to lose your daughter to some bird shit disease. They chanted Buddhist scriptures. And after chanting, guess what? They arranged to play Christian hymms as my cousin wanted to be a C Girl. Weird eh. Went home.

Tuesday

Went to the funeral. This time it was to go to the crematorium. The mother let out a scream that really sounded....primal? The aunt gave an eulogy of sorts. I soo wanted to cry then. But for some reason, I can't? Went to the crematorium. Damn high tech there. There's this thingy that raised the coffin, this thingy to send the coffin into the...erm...furnace or something. Death is efficient huh? Went home after that. Tired. Slept.

Wednesday.

Went to work. Received another weird news? Jeslyn called 18 siao down to whack someone! At first I fucking don't believe. But guess what? It was true? Jeslyn, 18 siaoer? HAHAHA! The thing got snowballed to something big. Time for Thursday.

Thursday.

Went to take my CSA paper. Won't elaborate. Boring. Kimberly called me. She said Jeslyn and someone got charged for rioting? At first I thought Kimberly was charged too. So I went down to TPSS. I had evidence arh. Talked to Michael Toh. Talked to Bernard. Lol. I really hope Jeslyn goes to Girls Home arh. Lets see.

Being a member of an unlawful assembly.
142. Whoever, being aware of facts which render any assembly an unlawful assembly, intentionally joins that assembly, or continues in it, is said to be a member of an unlawful assembly.

Punishment.
142. Whoever is a member of an unlawful assembly, shall be punished with imprisonment for a tem which may extend to 6 months, or with fine, or both.

hope you get your 6 months Jeslyn.